He struggles. This mighty man of strength, valor and bravery…this man who has fought the giants, who has defied death, who has given his all… his shoulders now slumped, his head in hand, he slowly feels his heart giving way to defeat.
How can this be?
For once this man stood so sure. He had purpose. He saw his dreams and embraced them whole-heartedly. He believed in seizing the day, and that was exactly what he did, with every breath that he breathed! He stood strong and charged life with clarity and resolve!
But somewhere in the pursuit, his strength had run out, the wounds he encountered began to chip away at his very soul. It was so subtle…so discreet that he never saw it happening. He wasn’t aware of THIS enemy…the one that lurks behind every thought and every deed, questioning his very existence! So crafty, he steals in the night and brings a stench so horrific that light is snuffed out and darkness picks up permanent residence. Blind-sided…he never saw it coming…and before he could call for help, he was overtaken.
The heaviness was the worst. This devil of an enemy kept him chained and imprisoned by the guilt of his past. The mistakes, the poor choices that cost so much, the regrets, the failures…this Snake kept reeling them in front of his mind day after day. He could find no release, no escape, so eventually he surrendered to the inevitable. There was no way out. He was forever enslaved to the darkness of his past…
And yet…
HOPE. She stood there with a smile so pure, so true. She offered Her hand…and for a brief moment, he almost reached forward. Could She be real? What She offered sounded so good…but before he had time to cipher through his thoughts, the Enemy struck hard! The low, insidious gurgle of a laugh resonated in the depth of his being…he felt the smirk and heard the mocking somewhere deep within his core.
Forgiveness, she offered. A Clean Slate. A Fresh Start. A Cleansing. Grace. Mercy.
But how? In his cell of self-hatred, he couldn’t begin to fathom how any of this good could be offered, let alone EMBRACED by such a one as he. But She didn’t move. She stood Her ground and that smile, it didn’t waver. The intensity of Her offer only increased as the Light began to illuminate the dark places of his heart…revealing each and every horrific deed he had ever done. He scrambled to hide…he felt so exposed. Whatever offer She had in mind must surely be off the table after She saw the filth of all he had ever done. There was no good within his heart…he could offer nothing in return. She would turn away, shake Her head in understanding, realize Her mistake in even trying to gaze upon his putrid soul.
But there She stood…unmoving. Her hands outstretched, waiting. And in that frozen moment, he began to see. For in Her eyes he saw that nothing was worthy of this forgiveness She offered. No one was good enough. The price She had paid was scarred into Her outstretched offering. Was he unworthy? Yes. Very much so. But She knew that before he was ever created. Before he drew his first breath upon this earth, unworthy was written across his story. She knew that, and still She smiled. For She specialized in the unworthy. Those were the ones She loved the most. For She knew that She was their only hope, their only salvation.
He tore his eyes away from Hers for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. He looked around him. And he saw…there was a war going on. His demons, every single last one of them, fighting with every fiber they were made of, to secure his soul for THEIR eternal plans. His stomach lurched forward…the sickness of his plight so vivid in the Light of Her smile. For when he looked back, his eyes beheld the entire scene. For Her smile was pure, but there was more. Her eyes were enflamed! In Her hands she held a sword, a sword of weight and of glory! She was engulfed with a passion of fire…illuminating Her intense Holiness! She was at war! At war for HIS very soul. The battle was raging around him…he was beginning to realize it always had been.
And he had to choose. She offered more than he could wrap his mind around…but Her offer held promise. Promise of victory. Promise of purpose and promise of more. She forgave him…even before he accepted…even before he forgave himself…She was Forgiveness and She stood ready to embrace him, to cover him, to release him from the prison he stood bound. She could forgive enough to cover his inability to forgive himself. She stood ready…Together they would fight this enemy who desperately wanted to keep him chained…chained to his past, his failures, his mistakes.
So he stood…
and…
