Only God

Grace Lord...I find it on my knees. Bowed low, I feel Your hands soothing away the "ugly" as Your fingers caress my hair back from my tear-stained face. I am prostrate before You...and that is when I feel the highest exalted! B/c it is when MY will is broken, that YOURS is made complete!

In the wee early of the day, my sleepy heart is stubborn. My knees bow, but oh so reluctantly. I refuse to bend...I keep the mean and ugly tucked away in the back of my mind...choosing to revisit it...holding on to the hurt and nasty...wallowing in it like a sow in the mud! I trudge downstairs to schoolbooks open on morning table. Little hands rub sleep away...and prayer is lost in the rush of hurry. In my flesh, I snap. She hurts. I bark. Tears well in her big bright eyes. She tries harder but words cannot be read through pools of sadness. She stumbles over simple and grace seems to have escaped through the cracks...

And he is putting dishes away steps beyond our reading time...he is joy-filled...singing as he works. And it bursts my concentration...and I snap again. And I watch his joy drain from his face...and God gently shakes me...whispers over my selfish ignorant heart...and I know. It is time to do a little knee duty. I bow before my boy, I ask for forgiveness, humbling this proud heart of mine. He smiles. He embraces me. He forgives. His joy is restored. She comes bounding around the corner and exclaims in joyful triumph, "I forgive you too". We all bow before the Forgiver Himself and give thanks. Thanks for forgiveness, for joy, for restoration. Grace. In a moment of fleshly "rotten"...He swoops down His grace of good and transforms our moment into beauty! Only God.