Fallen

Do you ever feel as though the blessing hand of God has been misplaced!?! I'm having one of those moments...searching deep within and realizing I am the one to blame. I can go about life from day to day and love God, think about Him, pray to Him, speak about Him, but forget to HONOR Him with everything inside of me! And as one day turns to two, and two days to three, time starts creeping by without my Lord as the foremost beginning and end to my everyday! I begin to loose focus on what truly matters...getting lost in the day to day clutter and business that seems to keep this life afloat! The mundane tasks overtake the breathtaking, awestruck awareness that the God of the entire universe, the very God who gave His only Son in my place, the same and one God who breathed life into this vessel of a body, THAT GOD has called me out of darkness...and called me to be His daughter, His child, His love! I've let the devotion that God demands of this soul to wane so thin, my faith become so weak, my love and trust so conditional that I've let our relationship slip right by, unnoticed! And then I wonder, where has His blessing gone? Why can't I see Him in the intricate and intimate details of my life anymore? Why am I struggling to keep my head above water, why am I second-guessing every decision, every event that takes place instead of leaning on His everlasting arms? Because, that is just it, I am not leaning on His arms at all!

But here I am Lord! I am running with all my might back into those precious arms of Love! I need You Jesus! I can't do this by myself! You think I would have learned that by now! But still I become self-centered, self-confident, self-assured that I know what I am doing. But I do not! Not a clue! Please forgive me, my sweet Savior! Help me stand again! Help me stand upon Your promises and not falter! I give You my all Jesus!